Blending Seasoning & Shame

I paused the blending of celery, garlic, onion and bell pepper— half made into tomorrow’s survival, just to think about shame.

How strange that is. How human.

The world has turned existing into performance critique. Every movement held beneath fluorescent judgment. Every softness labeled unbearable. Every unguarded habit dragged beneath the word cringe. And somehow even I have learned this language.

I hum now, instead of letting curses spill carelessly from my mouth. Not because I became pure overnight, but because the same tongue that once snaps with f*ck, sh*t, b*tch also trembles with Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah, Astaghfirullah.

People would call that contradiction. Maybe even embarrassing. But humans have always been contradictions. Some praise God and still break things in anger. Some love deeply and still speak cruelly. Some people yawn without covering their mouths. Some beg for attention from bosses, from fathers, from lovers, from strangers who almost looked their way. Some people perform indifference so theatrically it becomes another form of begging. Some walk directly into walls. Some miss the last stair. Some trip over their own feet while carrying everything they have left of themselves. And embarrassment follows them like a second shadow. Not because they’ve committed evil, but because shame has attached itself to harmless humanity.

Meanwhile the things that deserve real shame move freely through the world without consequence, without blush, without trembling. But tenderness? Clumsiness? Trying too hard? Speaking too openly?Wanting to be loved loudly? These are the crimes now. To exist sincerely has become unbearable to witness. And maybe that is the most humiliating thing of all— not that people are cringe, but that living honestly has become something people mock.